|
Welcome to the Illuminations and Sparks of Brilliance Archive of Illuminating Articles
"Bull-Fighting, Rabbit-Chasing
and Wrestling with
Pigs"
So...did I get your attention? Yes? I thought I
might! I did a small presentation for the
Greater
Seminole Area Chamber of Commerce on "How to Win Over Difficult Prospects".
The bull-fighting, rabbit-chasing and wrestling with pigs came as a
result of that (I never know what is going to come out of my mouth
when I get up to present!). Although this was targeted for use in
business situations, I think you will find this information useful
in all arenas of your Life where you are interacting with other people.
Sometimes we have to be like a bull-fighter.
So, what is it that the bull-fighter does? He invites
the bull to charge at him, but moves out of the
way so he does not get hit by the bull.
Question: Got any bull in your Life?
Those are the situations when another person is angry or
otherwise irritated and they are directing their
frustration toward you. You will never win if you
try to butt heads with a charging bull. Therefore,
if you invite the bull forward into the
conversation by validating his or her feelings
(that does NOT mean that you are agreeing),
offering some empathy, and saying the three
magical words of listening, "Is there more?", you
will save yourself both energy and heartache (and
headaches, too.head-butting an oncoming bull is
very tough on the noggin).
So, what does that have to do with rabbits?
Think about trying to catch a jack-rabbit in the wild.
You will run and run and run until you are
completely exhausted, and you still will have not
caught the rabbit. There are some people who will
want to talk and talk and talk once you give them
the opportunity to do so. The conversation can
result in chasing one rabbit after another. The
antidote to rabbit-chasing is to stay focused.
Acknowledge the person's desire to go off subject,
but then gently re-direct them back on the path of
the topic. Repeat as often as needed.
In addition, there are also conversations that
have their whole basis in rabbit-chasing; meaning
that there is no way to get closure or resolution
within the conversation.
Take for example someone who wants to be "right" about their opinion. If
you engage in that conversation, you can plan on
feeling drained and quite possibly frustrated.
When you recognize those conversations, it may be
very wise of you to gracefully excuse yourself,
and not accept the invitation into the
conversation. Which brings us to pig-wrestling...
There is an old adage that goes something like
this: "If you wrestle with a pig, it matters not
whether you win or loose, because you both end up
covered in mud, and the pig likes it". There is no
point of getting into a power-struggle or argument
with someone who only wants to argue. These are
the places where a firm boundary would be
appropriate.
So, if you learn the fine art of bull-fighting,
and stay away from chasing rabbits and wrestling
with pigs, you will find yourself having plenty
enough positive energy to do whatever it is that
you would like to do with your Life.
So my last question to you (for today) is: What is
it that you would like to do with your Life?

<- To enter the Quotes Archive click on this door

<- To enter the Verse Archive click on this door
Click here to return to the main Article Archive!
Ken Donaldson, MA, LMHC
10410 Seminole Blvd., #3
Seminole, FL 33778
(727) 394-7325
Ken@REALationshipCoach.com
www.REALationshipCoach.com
“Illuminating and Inspiring Brilliance”
© copyright 2004-2005 Ken Donaldson - Kenilee Inc. - all rights reserved

|